Many of us have couples that we consider “Relationship Goals”. Some of us consider couples we don’t even know to be goals. What are relationship goals? What should that look like and who should we really look up to for that?
Social media is infamous for making relationships look better than they actually are. You see a picture of a beautiful couple, but you may not know they just had an argument right before they took the picture. I think we put too much attention on looking at someone else’s relationship and claiming that as goals for us.
I want to bring a different perspective on relationship goals. Create your Own! Whether you’re in a relationship or not, create a vision for what it is that you or y’all desire. The Bible says in Proverbs 29:18, “Where there is no vision, the people perish…”.
Whenever I read this scripture, I only thought about a vision for my career path or ministry, but never in a relationship. I believe if we start creating a vision for what it is we want to see in our relationships we will begin to see more fruitful relationships.
Just my personal opinion, I don’t think a couple who travels the world and have been dating for 5 years is goals. That’s not what I want for my life. I’m 27 years old. I don’t have 5 years to be wondering if you want to marry me or not. For someone else this may be what they desire.
When you think about goals, think about your future as well. Does this person carry my destiny? Are they able to help me reach my full potential? A good look is okay but what about purpose?
After my divorce, I really didn’t know what I wanted; I decided I didn’t care about having a man of God and almost preferred the opposite. I had decided I didn’t want that because of my own hurt and pain. After dealing with my own wounds, I not only came to the conclusion about what I might want but also what I need. I couldn’t get there until I dealt with the issues of my soul. I did in fact want to be married again and have a family. I realized I truly did want a man of God.
Many of you have settled in your relationships for the sake of companionship and because the wounds in your soul say this is better than nothing. Why can’t you be married? Why can’t you have a man that covers you and prays for you? Why can’t you be with someone that loves your children like their own? The answer is you can have all that and more.
In the image above I put my grandparents because they are a real couple that I have seen and known since I was born. Lol. Their relationship is not perfect, but there are many things about their relationship that are goals for me.
Maybe relationship goals isn’t about choosing one couple and trying to be like them, but choosing aspects of relationships that you admire and making it goals for yourself.